2. Washington Nationals. Off to an unexpectedly uneven start (9-7), but just two weeks ago this team was widely considered to be the best in baseball. If there's a concern, it's how scary-bad Dan Haren has been (8.10 ERA).
3. Detroit Tigers. Power rotation, scary lineup ... the only weakness here is the bullpen, which lacks a shutdown reliever. The undead vampire Jose Valverde lurks in the minor leagues, biding his time.
4. Cincinnati Reds. Like the Nationals, it hasn't been smooth sailing. The injury to Johnny Cueto doesn't help. On the bright side, Joey Votto has already walked twenty-four times. Only one other player has even half that many. That's also four more walks than Delmon Young had in 608 plate appearances all of last season. Insane.
5. San Francisco Giants. A 10-7 record despite awful starts from Buster Posey and Matt Cain, both of whom will be just fine. Tim Lincecum has so far managed to keep his strikeout total (15) above his walk total (12), but it's a race worth following.
6. Texas Rangers. In 26.2 innings across four starts, Yu Darvish has struck out thirty-eight hitters, walked only eight, and allowed just a .144 batting average.
7. Boston Red Sox. Clearly going to be much better than preseason expectations. As long as they don't end up relying too heavily on quality innings from John Lackey, this looks like the best team in the AL East.
8. St. Louis Cardinals. In 29 innings, Adam Wainwright has struck out 28 hitters and walked ... zero. What happens when he faces Votto?
9. Oakland Athletics. Their 12-5 start would be far more impressive if eight of those wins hadn't come against the Astros and Mariners.
10. Toronto Blue Jays. Kind of a nightmarish opening to what was supposed to be a triumphant season. Jose Reyes is out for months, Jose Bautista and R.A. Dickey have been dealing with injuries of their own, and the pitching has been dismal. They've been outscored by 30 runs already, second-worst in all of baseball, ahead of only the lowly Marlins.
11. New York Yankees. Plugging right along with a hilariously bizarre lineup full of misfits and rejects, chief among them being Travis Hafner (hitting .349/.440/.767) and Francisco Cervelli (boasting an ever-so-slightly-inflated OPS of 1.012).
12. Los Angeles Dodgers. It might be time to start worrying about Matt Kemp, who's hitting .182 with 18 strikeouts against just three walks. Without him performing, only the Marlins have scored fewer runs this season than the Dodgers.
13. Baltimore Orioles. They've assembled a simple formula: scrape together just enough pitching to win while Adam Jones and Chris Davis (33 RBIs combined) hit the snot out of the ball.
14. Arizona Diamondbacks. Severely overshadowed in the NL West by the championship-winning Giants and the big-spending Dodgers. But this is a very solid team that will challenge for a playoff spot, especially considering how well Paul Goldschmidt is hitting (.333/.394/.556).
15. Los Angeles Angels. The left side of the infield is currently Brendan Harris and Luis Jimenez. Their lineup also just dropped eight runs on the Tigers on Friday. So maybe their lack of depth doesn't really matter. We'll find out.
16. Tampa Bay Rays. Basically the mirror image of the Angels. The pitching is outstanding, but their offense is literally vomit (who knew a team batting average of .217 was even possible). You're asking for it if Shelley Duncan is getting at-bats as your "designated hitter."
17. Kansas City Royals. There's a serious lack of power here; Billy Butler is the only Royal with multiple home runs.
18. Cleveland Indians. At the 2010 All-Star break, Ubaldo Jimenez was 15-1. His ERA in 45 starts with the Indians is 5.60. What happened?
19. Colorado Rockies. Somehow, this awful team is 12-4. I choose to ignore what I do not understand.
20. New York Mets. Young sophomore Matt Harvey has been the most electrifying pitcher in baseball so far, having allowed totals of just three runs and ten hits across four starts.
21. Pittsburgh Pirates. In his most recent outing, A.J. Burnett was flirting with a perfect game until he lost it in the most A.J. Burnett way possible -- by hitting a batter.
22. Philadelphia Phillies. Incredibly, this team went four straight games without drawing a single walk. How does that happen to a professional baseball team?
23. Chicago White Sox. Joey Votto, by himself, has 24 walks. The Chicago White Sox, as a team, have 26.
24. Seattle Mariners. They should be a lot better than this. They do have, after all, one of the best pitchers in baseball and a slightly-revamped lineup. But Raul Ibanez is also getting regular playing time in left field, which is indicative of how things are really going.
25. Milwaukee Brewers. The usual: lots of offense, not enough pitching, awful bullpen. Same as it ever was.
26. Minnesota Twins. Their current starting rotation is: Vance Worley, Scott Diamond, Kevin Correia, Mike Pelfrey, and Liam Hendriks. It's amazing that the Twins don't lose every game.
27. Chicago Cubs. Fun fact: their roster is a cornucopia of cool names, both first (Wellington, Starlin, Dioner) and last (Samardzija, Fujikawa, Rizzo). And in some cases, both at the same time (Darwin Barney). Those are the only interesting things there are to be said about the Cubs.
28. San Diego Padres. Here's all you need to know about the Padres: they've already committed five first-inning sacrifice bunts this year. Who sacrifices in the first inning?! Comparatively, the rest of baseball has combined for four first-inning sac-bunts. Maybe there's a reason for that.
29. Miami Marlins. 33 total runs scored in 17 games is ... not a good rate.
30. Houston Astros. Their hitters are striking out in over 26% of their plate appearances, which would be the all-time record. The Astros might be bad, but at least they're the best at being bad.
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